I have been listening to Björk for days again, I love her music and expression. I really truly admire her. For her way to know how to express herself/ her ideas/ her art and being able to follow through, produce and giving us this incredible gift, which is her music.
Enjoy!
Btw: The video is not official from Björk but fanmade. It is quite disturbing, but I like it.
Wow!
It has been ages since I wrote in my blog.
This was a crazy busy year with severe health issues in my family, suddenly finding myself close again to my parents and having to take care of them. I might tell You some other time about the stress, emotional conflict and overwhelm , this sudden caretaking caused.
Having to leave my hometown so often , my business was running very low or better say crawling and actually resting!
That caused several financial panic attacks: In summer I was so broke I had no idea how to buy food for me and my cat. Of course the cat got sick, too and had to go to the Vet, which sure I did but therefor even had less money. Useless to say, that my bank account was on the maximum line of credit.
However this ADD mind of mine works, I
1. Procrastinated earning some money and remained in a state of panic
2. Finally, under extreme financial pressure, I started to write job applications for all kind of jobs that I was not really interested in – I love being self-employed!
3. Eventually I wrote applications for 2 schools to work as a teacher for Aromatherapy – Yes! I actually wanted to apply there long-time!
4. Recherched and checked out ways how to pay less for health insurance and wrote several letters to my insurance to pay less and get some money back from years before, something that was on my to-do-list for long, too.
Momentary Happy-end: 🙂
1. I now pay less for health insurance and even got some money back.
2. I am still self-employed! 🙂
3. I rented out part of my practice space- another thing I wanted to do for a year now! So that saves me some money each month.
4. I got both jobs as a docent for Aromatherapy! Hurray! :-))
Happily one of them already started in September and the next part of the lecture is next week. …well yes, i am procrastinating or not prioritizing right now, as i should either prepare my lecture or go to bed! Anything BUT writing in my Blog! well, well, …
5. A friend of mine asked me to give a paid!!! Workshop on Bodylanguage and Massage. Which I did last weekend.
After having less money then none at all I have some o.k. money for now.
After having no paid work for a long time I have to give two 4 day – lectures on Aromatherapy in a school in my town and two 8 hour workshops in Berlin. All of that in 2 months…including preparing the lectures!
Which means: Stress! Excitement! Stress! Panic, too! Excitement! Work!
What is this?
I am actually a bit ashamed to say that. Even though I know how I work or how my brain works.
I mean, I had A LOT of work!
I was really afraid and panicking I won’t be able to prepare the Aromatherapy course in time. Especially after i had to follow a given and broadly defined lecture plan, having no idea what they were actually asking for.
I had very LITLLE TIME for preparation!
Every job was and is in a short time. One after the other.
This is how my brain works.
I hope my heart can cope with this panic and extreme rhythm, too.
Panic and Stress means Adrenalin and Dopamin.
And that makes me run and work and structure myself like I could not do before! Continue reading
primrose . scan and photoshop(c) thefemmeaddon
It is almost 4 a.m. and I am still not in bed. Listening to an amazing music mix from this site .
I am thinking about perfectionism. These days I am all over the place, doing all kind of things and they leave me frustrated cuz nothing seems good enough.
On the one hand good- I am creating stuff, I have tons of ideas– nothing business related- just creativity for my satisfaction.
I am painting, sewing, scetching, colouring, doing wood works, writing and everything all together , chaotic- one day this, the other day or minute that. And while I am doing one thing, my mind already jumps to the next new ideas. Rollercoaster of thoughts.
On the other hand, because of my restlessness , in my hyper- state I want to do everything at once, realize my ideas- NOW!
And it feels like I don’t have the time to dig into the matter and become better. Which ends up, me doing a bit here and a bit there. Or maybe I actually have the time and don’t allow myself to stay focused on one thing? Or can’t?
One problem is perfectionism.
I don’t remember when I became so perfectionistic. Continue reading
In between or better say instead of doing work related things, I started a comic-sketch-painting series of “Procrastinating Super Woman”.
A busy grrrl having much to do, so no time (yet) for saving the world!
I was curious about illustration and as I already started experiencing with watercolor, I thought I’ll give it a try.
Have fun! 🙂
Procrastinating Super Woman, Watercolor pastels and Ink pen (c) thefemmeaddon
Finally! As long promised I wrote an article full of information to help You to use and choose essential oils.
The characteristics of an essential oil are summoned in its scent.
The scent should be pleasant to You.
Scents have a direct stimulus on our brain.
If You dislike a scent, it can have a negative stimulus to Your brain and might have a negative effect on You or one that You don`t wish to have. An unpleasant scent can be a constant unpleasant stimulus to Your brain and therefor turn out to be negative stress.
There might be some organic store or herbal store close to where You live, where You can smell the oil before You buy it. Some shops have test bottles.
If You don`t have the possibility to smell the essential oil before you buy it, You can choose Your essential oil by
Read more here.
Can’t seem to make up my mind on what and where to start!
I haven’t painted that! I would love to be able to paint like this! It’s just the photo software and a pic of my messy table.
I made myself such a beautiful plan of tasks to reach goals , full of post-it papers in all colours and precisely sorted.
And now I am stuck again!:-(
How to get motivated? I am even too unmotivated in doing nothing!!!
The sun is shining and it is warm outside, the best weather to go out in the parc and collect herbs.
My flat is a mess! In my sleeping room I have to move around piles of clean clothes,
I haven’t put in place yet and step around piles of clothes on the floor that I have to sort out.
My work space is full of piles of paper, empty bottles and dirty dishes, books, pens, full ashtray.
And tonight there is a party, I wanted to go to. Even this free time amusement IS STRESSING ME OUT!!!
I could just start with doing ONE thing, that will uplift me. But….
See, my bad mood is rising clouds outside! Maybe it will rain? So I cannot go and collect herbs today!!!
Yippie! task moved…procrastinated…to an unknown date…
ISN’T IT REALLY STRANGE THAT EVEN THE THINGS THAT ARE FUN TURN OUT TO STRESS ME OUT???
AND THAT I CAN’T GET MOTIVATED EVEN FOR FUN THINGS???
And the other thing is: I actually know how to help myself, I could burn some incense, get some essential oils that will get me motivated, but WTF!!!
I am especially unmotivated in helping myself!
Days like this….
I will leave you and me here without any solution, no advice…just an unmotivated mood!
Hey see, I actually got motivated to write this post, at least! Hurray???
I am just re-reading a wonderful book I bought years ago in Findhorn, Scotland.
It is called: ” Psychic Protection: Creating positive energies for people and places ” from William Bloom.
What I really love about this book is, that it’s down-to-earth, with easy & practical advice that is not based on superstitious or super-esoteric beliefs.
I’d like to share especially the following shake advice, not only because I like it and it is fun, but because I think it is very helpful for ADHDers who are (emotional/ energetic) hypersensitive and also for those Hypersensitives without ADHD.
Imaginative Landscape, Aquarell (c) thefemmeaddon
Psychic? Hypersensitive?
In my opinion being emotional or energetical hypersensitive is not so far away from being psychic. In the meaning of being psychic is something everybody can be.
Psychic for me means to be able to use one or more senses, in a far more extended way. For example : Seeing more- clairevoyant; hearing more – claireaudiance… And not only to use Your sense(s) more, but to be able to tune in to another frequence.
Maybe the difference of being psychic or hypersensitive, is to be able to use, to shut off and understand your extended sense(s) and “signals” for the better. Well, at least in the best case!
Feeling attacked?
Another thing hypersensitive and psychic people have in common is, that they might feel energies or moods from other people are stuck on them. That they feel uncomfy at some places, with some people or they are excessively emotional disturbed after sensing or seeing a fight or another extreme situation, even if they are not personally involved in it.
This often ends up in being sad or depressed or angry for no reason.
Some believe this has to do with collecting the energy of other people/ places and some even believe they get emotionally attacked by somebody.
Blocked Energy
And here, after long explanation, I come back to the mentioned book and the advice. Continue reading
Wanna look the way You always wished, with no need of exercise, diets, surgery or all the other unnecessary torture?
Here comes the best way to do so:
Haven’t written for a while, so at least I like to share this hillarious video with you! 😉
Have fun!
Yeah I have done so much today! 🙂
I had a work date real late at 7 pm and needed to prepare a lot before that.
I researched accupuncture points and herbs for recipes for a specific condition.
Not that I havent done that several times, but where did I write that down??? I lost the papers or cant find them. Also every case is different, so I need to do research anyway.
A quick sketch of WHAT A MESS! (c) thefemmeaddon
But this time I actually did the research AND wrote it down on my computer so at least it is saved on the disc. Improve! Improve! 🙂
Then I felt so professional, when I called up a homeopathic company, to ask them about a specific remedy they make and if it suits to my client needs.
I say I felt professional, cuz it reminded me so much of games, that I used to play when I was a kid.
I had this kids post-office game with different forms, stamps and postage stamps and I loved to get everything sorted, stamp it, write and fill out the forms.
Yeah the kid forms to fill out, were easy and fun!:)
…not like the complicated adult forms, where You dont know what they want from You and where- in some cases- you have to be so specific and correct that if you make a mistake you pay a fee or go to jail / hell!!! 😦
I mean, no wonder so many people hate paper work if what you write can have a huge/ scary consequence!
I also loved to play something like a secretary or manager, where I would make calls, arrange things and dates, order stuff….
Of course I didnt have to check my finances for ordering. Of course none of my calls were real…I talked to an imaginary person.
Of course none of the dates I arranged, I had actually to go to!
That was fun!!!:-)
It is often said, that ADDers should make a game of their tasks. Today at least the call felt like a game and was fun. Afterwards.
Wanna know how my day went on? Continue reading
theFemmeADDon 